Smart Note, a miraculous demonetization gift :P

Smart Note

When the world is worried about burning Samsung notes, I am talking about a different note. My father is in ICICI, mother in Axis, brother in SBI and husband in Corporation. Sorry we aren’t a bank family; just all are standing in ATM queues. Last Sunday, I was also in need of some money but my short height couldn’t wade through the queue so I decided to visit the ATM in the midnight. I quietly go and enter the ATM and flash my debit card, ATM says – no money honey! I was in despair and about to return, suddenly ATM makes ‘’tud tud tud’ noise. Alas a new note. It slowly says – ‘hey suchi, just for you. It comes running in shah rukh khan style and stands in my palm’ 

The note gives its ice breaker speech. (It smirks and says, I know you are a toastmaster). I am smart note. One solution to all our problems. To counter poverty, terrorist financing, heavy shopping, fake notes, black money! The moment you start evading tax or file wrong returns/medical bills, I will turn automatically black in your wallet. I was in awe of this. Suddenly it winks and closes my mouth.

You know, North Korea already introduced this note. If the notes in your wallet starts vanishing I will tell, ‘aukat mein raho- stay within your limits’. The moment your spouse or children start asking you money, I will go and hide and text you- ‘sorry bro, I am not reachable’. This note has all the features. During your appraisals, the note will send an auto alert to your boss, ‘please have mercy on this fellow’. The moment you jump the signal lights, it will jump out of your wallet and go and sit in police man’s wallet. If ever you go to any government office to get done your work, it will suddenly sit on the table in front of the babus.

I wanted to check further, went to UB city and was glancing through the Louis Vuitton bag, suddenly my note says – ‘remember, you are a corporate coolie, not the CEO and toink, it gets inside my wallet.

One good thing I liked about this note is – it sends me a daily reminder of people who has to pay me money. I remember all my best friends’ every day.

It’s highly – husband friendly. It also sends a reminder to my husband if he misses to send me good morning, good afternoon and good evening messages. It totally believes in being human.  Today while I sat in my car to drive till here, it handed over my driving license and tells me, here is your license to kill the dwellers, Mrs. Bond! How diligent. It also sent a text as soon as reached, ‘Mrs. Bond, while returning, I can be your driver too.

Yesterday night I was about to sleep, and my note starts singing for me- You and I in this beautiful world and morning sends a text- you’re beautiful Suchi, whenever you go I follow, I am your hutch dog. This note and I have a love bond, so, if you ever try to steal this note, the man in the note will come and slap you, one phataak!